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Friday, October 19, 2012

Whose dog is it? When your child asks for a dog

Most kids love dogs.  Which is great because most dogs love kids!  The challenge that many parents face is that kids beg and beg for a dog, and then once the parents finally give in and get them the dog... don't take care of it.  The parents are shocked:  "How could my offspring not take care of this little animal that they spent years begging me for!"  But the reality is that a dog that comes into a family is the adult's dog.  So if you are not ready for a dog for 10-15 years, do NOT get one.

But my kids really want one....

The reality is that if you - the parent - are not willing to commit to taking care of (which means: feeding, walking, cleaning up after and paying for) a dog for 10-15 years, then you should not get one.  I bet that your children often ask for things that they can't have or that they shouldn't have.   If your child just wanted to eat candy bars and drink Coke for every meal, you would say no, right?

If you are not ready to make the big commitment to a dog, then you need to stick to your guns and not get the dog.  Dogs are not for everyone.

How do I know if we are ready for a dog?  We have never had one/I haven't had one since I was a kid.

You can always foster a dog with a local rescue for a couple weeks or a month to see if you are ready for the commitment.  Petfinder is a great resource to find a local rescue.  Not every rescue fosters dogs out to families, but if you keep looking, you will find one in your region that will let you "try before you buy".  Plus, you will be helping a dog that needs a temporary home before he or she goes to his forever home.  If you foster the dog in your home then the rescue can usually save another dog's life since you have freed up some space for them to house another dog.   The South Florida based rescue that I volunteer with, This is the Dog!, has a great foster care network and is always looking for foster families to provide temporary homes for the dogs in their care.

You could also pet sit a friend's dog while they travel to see if you and your family are ready for a dog.  I recommend that you keep the dog in your home for at least a week to really get a sense of dog ownership.

I think it will teach my kids responsibility.... 

It might.  But it might not.  It might just make you mad because they are not meeting your expectations.  And there are a ton of other great ways to teach your kids responsibility.  I think the best way is to have your child do chores.  Even little ones as young as 3 and 4 can help by folding socks or picking up their toys.  And as kids get older, they can have more complicated chores.

If you REALLY want to get a pet to teach your children to be responsible, get a fish.  Not to be cruel, but having a fish die is much less tragic than having a dog run away, starve, get sick or be given to the pound only to be put to sleep after you (the parent) is "tired" of your kid not taking care of the dog.  The ASPCA has a great guide with pet recommendations for different ages of kids.  

OK.  I (the parent) will commit to the dog for 10-15 years.  Now what?

Do your homework and make sure that you adopt a dog that has the right kind of personality for your family and lifestyle.  If you like to chill and watch TV after work, do not get a Husky or a Jake Russell, no matter how cute you think they are!

Be sure to research how much it costs to own a dog.  Make sure you can afford the annual outlay... it is typically around $2,000 - $4,000 a year to feed and care for a dog (assuming no major accidents or surgeries).

Be sure to think about which ADULT will be ultimately responsible for taking care of the dog.  You can assign your kids dog related chores, but at the end of the day, it is on you.  So make sure that you and your spouse or partner have a plan for who will do what with your new dog.

And spay and neuter your pet... we do not need any new dogs when over 3,000,000 (that's 3 million folks) are euthanized EVERY year in the United States.  And remember: adopt, don't shop!

by Gemma Torcivia
October 19, 2012

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